A tug at the gut...

Sometimes, I hear something or read something that really strikes a chord with how I am feeling at a particular moment. Friends tell me that I am sometimes really good with finding the words to capture what I'm thinking or how I'm feeling, but the truth is, I often feel that musicians and screenwriters are able to do that much better than I am. Maybe that's why I like quotes so much and like to share quotes with others.

Tonight, I went to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Towards the end of the film, Brad Pitt's character Benjamin spoke these words in a voice over:

“...What I think is, it’s never too late...or, in my case, too early, to be whoever you want to be...There’s no time limit, start anytime you want...change or stay the same...there aren’t any rules...We can make the best or worst of it...I hope you make the best...I hope you see things that startle you. Feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people who have a different point of view. I hope you challenge yourself. I hope you stumble, and pick yourself up. I hope you live the life you wanted to...and if you haven’t, I hope you start all over again.”

These words hit me right in the gut as I watched the film, and I couldn't help but feel moved by them. Obviously, I just took the time to find the actual quote online so I wouldn't have to resort to paraphrasing. It's amazing to me how much these words sum up how I've been feeling over the past eight weeks or so.

Trying to decide who it is I want to be in the next stage of my life. Thinking about what I like about myself that I want to hold on to, while at the same time figuring out what is it I want to let go of in order to grow. Deciphering how to enjoy each moment and not get aggravated or annoyed by meaningless moments. Looking for new opportunities to spend time with people I typically wouldn't or to do things I normally wouldn't want to partake in. Taking chances with people and situations I would have avoided in the past for fear of how things would turn out. Feeling like I made a mistake one moment but realizing I didn't the next.

It's all so poetic really. Trying to find the life I want, the life I need, to finally feel the contentment I so strongly desire.