Nostalgia. Better yet, NO-stalgia.

The end of another academic year is in sight. In just a few weeks, I will be able to put the academic year 2007-2008 behind me. I am extremely welcoming of this opportunity. I can say with certainty that this past year has NOT been one of my favorites. In fact, it's been quite the opposite. I have a hard time looking back on the "good times" or the times I felt that my time and energy was "worth it." The fact is, more often that not, I have felt the exact opposite, and memories of disappointment and frustration seem difficult to shake and forget. It's one of the first years for me in higher education that I have difficulty looking back with any sense of nostalgia for what transpired over the past 9 months.

Dictionary.com defines nostalgia as "a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one's life, to one's home or homeland, or to one's family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time."

For most times in my life, I can experience nostalgia for at least some point of a given year. Examples include:

a late day in April, 2003 - desire to be at Bucknell, maybe at wing night, eating and drinking with friends and generally feeling like I don't want to be anywhere else in the world

a hot summer day in July, 2004 - desire to be in Italy, eating fresh tomatoes and mozzarella, drinking wine, and taking in new sites and sounds

any day in the spring of 2005 - spending time in my apartment at Miami with my favorite neighbors, sharing updates, crying/laughing and generally feeling supported in everything I do

I can easily find myself yearning for this moments.

Now it seems all I can easily yearn for is this academic year to end as soon as possible.

I am thankful my parents and my best friend will be here at the end of the semester. It seems somewhat ironic that they have plans to be here with me, given that I will feel even better about celebrating the end of this hellish year with three of the most important people in my life. Maybe these upcoming visits will help bring a moment that I can feel nostalgic about one day in the future.